Chapter 1
As he sat at his desk staring at his calendar delicately painted with a photo of an ocean; the sun dancing above the water, holding hands with a few tangerine clouds, he looked over the red letters marking his endeavors planned for the month. He then stands and heads over to his work best friend's desk and perches his leg there needing a break. She looks up at him with an inquisitive look on her face.
“Yes…?” She asks, drawing out the s at the end.
“Well when you guys were laughing at the watercooler and waved me over, I was on a call so I couldn’t come and hang out. But, what did I miss?” He said with a sheepish grin.
“Oh, you didn’t miss much, just a joke about how I was trying to say something positive, but was clearly clenching my teeth while saying it. You didn’t really miss anything.” She waved him off. She’s been on a lifestyle change of changing her prescription to optimism instead of her old one being the definition of a pessimist. So far she’s doing great. Him on the other hand... he looked at her blank face while his brain spun with all the possibilities of that conversation that he had to miss out on. Despite it being an unimportant conversation, he struggled when he saw his friends doing something that he couldn’t be there for. If his friend wore the name tag of “optimist in training”, then he wore the name tag that read, “I am accompanied by major FOMO” (fear of missing out).
She looked back up at him seeing his wheels turning. “Really, you missed nothing, but we were going to try and go out to lunch tomorrow if you want to come.”
“Ah, I was planning on catching up on a few things tomorrow… but I’ll work on shuffling it around.”
“Don’t worry about it, we’ll go again at a different time.” She stood to walk to the kitchen. He stood and followed her over until they passed his desk and he split off. “Ok, yeah I’ll catch you guys next time.” He sat down and she nodded and disappeared behind the wall. He spent the rest of that hour talking himself into his decision.
Chapter 2
He had dinner with some other friends that night. He was exhausted, but that was not about to stop him from going and enjoying the aroma of his friends' company. When he got there he pushed his thoughts of a restful evening aside and immersed himself in the conversations and food that took residency in front of him. They sat and laughed, which was a better way of winding down a work day than simply talking himself through another rerun of Suits, though he took no shame in his quiet evenings. A few of the party had paid and taken their leave knowing an early morning was waiting for them at home. They all easily said goodbye. But, he stayed.
“I’m shocked you haven’t called it a night yet”, one of his friends said, drawing his drink up toward his mouth with his head tipped in his direction.
“Nah, I’m good. How often are we all free to get together these days?” He said, setting his drink back on the table, plates already attending their after-dinner baths in the kitchen.
“Not wrong there!” Another one of the guys said across the table.
“Man, when did life become so busy anyway?” The first guy said stirring the ice that was now the only occupant of his glass.
“Gosh, sometime between gas becoming unaffordable and house prices being out of 80% of our budgets.” He said, pulling a laugh out of the group sitting before him.
“Not wrong there.” Another friend said, her eyes still holding the laugh as she lifted her hands to gesture to the waitress asking for the check.
They sat a few minutes longer, deciding to play credit card roulette, having the waitress choose a card from the pile to pay for the remaining company. Thankful his card was not chosen, he was ready to hug his bed. He honestly would have liked to have left about 20 minutes ago, but leaving knowing the rest of the group was still gathered tugged on his thoughts and it was more emotional to feel like he was missing out than to go to sleep a few minutes later. So he waited to walk out and say goodbye and hear the remaining laughs of the rest who remained.
Chapter 3
He opened his eyes the next morning and told himself he was going to have a good day like he did every morning. He got dressed, fed his cat, gathered his extra paperwork and laptop, and walked to the door ready for a busy day. He stopped by a coffee shop on the way to the office, grabbing a bagel and two coffees. As he arrived at work, he greeted his co-workers with a good morning and an attitude that emulated the morning glow that poked its way through the office windows. On his way to his desk, he made a pit stop slinging his leg atop his friend's desk and placing the other coffee next to her very empty mug that looked like it was about to ask if it was needed for the subpar kitchen coffee.
She swung her gaze to him, her eyes still a bit hungry for a few more minutes of sleep. “How did you know I was fighting the intrusive thought to run down the block to get one of these?” She asked, placing the cup under her nose taking in a whiff of the scent of good coffee.
“It was my turn this week since you saved us last week.” He explained as he lifted his cup to take a sip.
“It was pretty bad that day, wasn’t it?” She wrinkled her nose at the memory. “Just double checking you're still too busy for lunch with us?” She looked at her cup and then up at him with no expectation on her face, just genuine curiosity.
He took a deep breath hating the feeling of turning down time to hang with his friends. “Yeah, I still have a mountain of work to catch up on.” He said standing.
“Ok, sounds good.” She turned back to her computer, lifting her cup in the air, not looking back at him, “thanks for this.”
He walked back to his desk to start his long day.
Chapter 4
Lunchtime rolled around and his friend and other co-worker had left for lunch a few minutes ago. He knew his responsibility so he wasn’t about to forfeit his work, but he hated the feeling of missing out. What if they talk about something that comes up later and he will be in the dark because he missed the conversation? What if they take a photo and he isn’t there to be a part of the memory? Or even the thought of them having better food than the meal he had pre-made nudged him. All unnecessary thoughts, but thoughts that begged him nonetheless. FOMO is no joke when it comes to situations such as these. It creeps into every thought and leaves you feeling on edge and slightly jittery. But, he did his best to push the thoughts out of his head, and for a while, he was able to focus on his tasks at hand until he pulled out his phone to take a minute break. He looked down and saw each of their stories with photos of their good-looking food and a photo of them. Then the cycle of emotions flooded back through his mind yet again. He hid the feeling not wanting to come across as dramatic, but it was a simmer of feeling left out. But, he was snapped out of it when his boss called him from across the office.
“Boss?” he said, sliding up to the doorway of the office.
“Yes, would you be able to file this for me?” His boss glanced up at him over the computer.
He knew he should ask if another would be free to work on this since he was already working on catching up, but again the FOMO grasped the reins. The thought of his boss asking another to do the job or him ruining his chances of being asked to do a task again for his boss encircled him. To which he replied, “No problem, I can get that back to you by the end of the day.”
He then went back to his desk, put his head down, pushed aside all other thoughts, and let his smile infuse into his mood. So he got to work.
Chapter 5
After he had finished his extra work and was finishing up his boss's task, his office friend showed up next to his desk, hand extended out to him.
“What is this?” He said finishing typing before looking at her hand and then to her.
“Figured you'd want a cookie since you couldn’t make lunch.” She shook the little box in her hand for him.
“You can’t ever quit.” He said through a sigh of relief letting his previous tension roll off of him as he claimed the box from her. Something so small as his friends thinking of him while they were out relieved a little of the fear that he was missing something.
“Thank you!” He called after her as he slipped open the box to reveal a chocolate chip cookie lying peacefully.
“Anytime.” she said back to him as she walked back to her desk and lifted her hand to give him a “no problem” wave.
FOMO can come across as a mildly dramatic way of thinking, but it’s this intense argument that dances not so gracefully around the mind. It is a fear of missing out on something or someone. I experience this emotion far more often than is appreciated. And with the addition of social media to the mix, it adds another flavor that causes the brain to do a fun number of added cartwheels. But, like always, where one suffers another can share the same experience. And if this is new to you, I hope it gives some perspective to those of us who struggle. If this is you, I can understand and I empathize with you. I hope that you weren’t drowned with situations of feeling FOMO as much as this guy this week and I hope you can have an amazing weekend. Don’t forget to leave a comment letting me know if you feel this too, follow on Instagram, share this with someone, and subscribe. Thanks for reading Allie-Cats!
Dru Allie
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